“In an “integrated” culture, where women and gay people mingle with men and straight people but where few straight men want to be perceived as gay, heterosexual men likely feel increasingly anxious regarding their sexual status.Thus, they may adhere to gender stereotypes with even more ferocity than previous generations to prove that they are straight.” (Way, 2011, p.32)

I cannot count how many times I have heard the term “gay” being thrown around with the goal of demeaning another individual due to what they may be wearing or due to a mere action or phrase they may have said. Of course, in many cases, when one calls out the perp for using a word that should have no negative connotation to it whatsoever, and yet they are using it to make fun of or put someone down, the response is usually that it is just a joke, and that everybody understands. I found this quote to be so interesting, especially since we do tend to claim ourselves to be more “open-minded” and “advanced” in the US compared to many other countries, yet we truly are lagging as a society that claims to be “accepting” and “integrated.” This is something that is so engrained in our culture, where being perceived as different puts into jeopardy one’s chance of comfort and happiness, where it can cost one’s own career, friends and family. Therefore, individuals learn to live secret internal lives and create a protective outer shell that abides to society’s expectations.