“At the same time, more women are remaining childless, either by choice or circumstance. Twenty percent of women in their 40s do not have children, Mr. Furstenberg said, pointing out that ‘not having children would have been considered bizarre or tragic in the ‘50s; now it’s a lifestyle choice.’ Laura Tisdel, 28, who grew up in Detroit, said, ‘I figure I’d either get married in college or right after and basically be a smart mother.’” (Patricia Cohen)
This passage made me reflect on the 1970’s women’s liberation movement during which women not having children no longer had as much of a stigma. It became socially acceptable to choose whether or not to get married or have children as a lifestyle. Before this movement, when a woman became pregnant or got married, her career, such as teaching, was typically over. I like the part at the end of the passage which states that this woman would rather be a smart mother. This woman’s experience made me think of my mother who got three college degrees before having children in her 30s.
Hi Cat! This passage was really fascinating to me as well. However, as much as I want to believe the stigma has been lifted, I catch myself wondering if it really has. Do you? As a young woman in her later 20s, children still feel like a far-off endeavor for me, yet I’ve already started to experience pressure about the topic. Now whether I actually feel that pressure is a different story, I just think it’s interesting that, from my experience, it’s typically women pressuring other women. I agree that many females in our age group are more liberated to postpone or even to reject motherhood, but I wonder if these same women, later on in their lives, will still feel liberated in that choice. What if it doesn’t happen for them and they never become moms? Will they find other ways to define their lives? I hope so. And as women that don’t feel stigmatized in the here and now (still without children), I hope we never have a change of heart and look down on those women sympathetically or tragically. You know what I mean?
between family and career