“She explained that the sights, smells, and sounds of school, the small chairs, the authority of the teacher—all these elements transport many parents to their own childhood schooling experiences, some of which may have been unpleasant or frightening. “The adults come together prepared to focus on the present and the future of the child, but instead they feel themselves drawn back into their own pasts, visited by the ghosts of their parents, grandparents, siblings, and former teachers, haunted by ancient childhood dramas” (p. 4). Add to that the unfamiliarity with the particulars of U.S. schools, any linguistic obstacles immigrant parents may have, and their likely strong desire to impress teachers and other school people, and the power implications are unmistakable. Hanhan (2003) explained that in these circumstances, it is incumbent upon teachers, representing the less vulnerable position, to “make the first move.” Furthermore, power differences can only be changed when the perception of teachers as experts and parents as novices is recalibrated, and teachers can lead the way on these efforts as well (Doucet & Tudge, 2007; Lawrence-Lightfoot, 2003). Finally, educators should be open to the possibility that many immigrant families may strongly desire relationships with schools and teachers that follow commonly accepted U.S. paradigms. But rather than assume that the process of building those partnerships will take traditional paths, educators should be prepared to recognize divergent means to reaching common goals.”

This passage really spoke to me because it intimately describes what an alienating experience coming back to a school might be for a parent, especially one who is mistrustful of the institution of an American school. I never explicitly thought about how going into a school can bring back all sorts of bad memories and associations of school for parents. Even though that makes sense, I think I was always trained to be so attuned to how students might feel inside of a school that I never thought about how parents may feel. Especially as a kid, I always thought that parents and teachers were both adults, both exerted roughly equal amounts of control over me, and so were on the same level – I never paid attention to any sort of power dynamic that may go on between them. I particularly like how this passage highlights that immigrant parents often want their children to succeed, but because they can often feel so culturally alienated by American schools, they don’t necessarily show that in ways we understand. This passage is an important call to action for educators to realize this and try to reach out in non-traditional ways.