Last fall, NYUSPS student Pauline Miller’s essay “Getting Married is Better Than Dying, Right” was published in The New York Times’ Modern Love column. Pauline began her essay in the course Write What You Know with NYUSPS CALA instructor Catherine Crawford. What follows is an interview with Pauline about her experience publishing her essay in the Times.
How did the course Write What You Know impact the development of your piece? Was there any piece of advice that you were given by the instructor or your fellow students that really helped you?
I think the most important thing the Write What You Know course did was to give me the confidence to keep writing. I had been keeping a journal for years, but had never taken a creative nonfiction class. I was pretty nervous about sharing my stories. But Catherine [Crawford] established a very positive, non-judgmental atmosphere and consistently offered constructive criticism. I also had a talented group of classmates who gave honest (but tactful) feedback.
How did you decide to submit your piece to The New York Times?
The week leading up to my marriage was very dramatic. I thought it would make a good Modern Love story if I could take the reader on the same roller coaster I went on.
What was the editing process like?
The editing process was very quick. It was less than two weeks from the time my piece was accepted to the date it ran. Dan Jones, the editor, was great to work with! I had never published anything before, and he really put me at ease. We talked through my essay in an hour-long phone call, and then went back and forth, mostly via email. He asked some thoughtful questions and had me expand upon a few ideas. I was surprised that he ultimately made only a few changes. They were small, but made a big impact. I have a very conversational style, so he made the essay more consistent with the general tone of the Times.
Was this your first time being published?
Yes. Talk about luck!
Since its publication have you gotten feedback from readers?
Readers emailed me and posted on my blog. It’s been amazing to connect with people from all over the country. Their responses have been very positive, and I was so happy to learn that my story has given hope to others who live with chronic illness.
Any advice you’d give to writers who are hoping to publish a Modern Love column?
The most useful guidance I can give to someone who wants to submit to Modern Love is to check out this google doc. It’s a list of Dan Jones’ submission tips, compiled by writer Laura Copeland.
Also, Dan likes very short cover emails because he’s extremely busy. My note to him was something like, “Dear Mr. Jones, I wrote this essay and think it’s a good fit for Modern Love. Hope you like it! Thanks for your time.” And I pasted the essay in the body of the email, as was recommended. It felt weird to write such a short introduction, but I did it, anyway. Dan later told me that even though he was swamped and not necessarily in the mood to read an entire piece when my email arrived, my first two sentences caught his eye and piqued his interest. That wouldn’t have happened if I’d written a long pitch.
You can’t control whether your essay is selected – there is some luck involved – so focus on the things you can control. Choose a love story that’s unique and timely, and tell it to the absolute best of your ability. (I worked on my piece for five months before submitting.) If it’s not chosen for Modern Love, you’ll still have a great essay that could be published elsewhere.
Do you have any more writing projects in the works?
I’m working on various humor pieces about the absurd aspects of living with lupus. I’m submitting them to magazines (online and in print), and would like to put them all together for a book.
Finally, how can readers follow you?
Readers can follow me on my blog, www.RollingWithLupus.com, on my Rolling With Lupus Facebook page, and on Twitter @RollinWithLu
NYU SPS Spring 2018 writing courses are now open for registration:
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