Read Xiao Liang’s《我在厨房摘下豌豆尖的花》
Read “In the Kitchen I Pluck a Pea Flower,” Hoiyan Guo’s translation of《我在厨房摘下豌豆尖的花》
Having read the poem time after time in the purpose of translation and its revision, I came to view the piece as a highly saturated image — in addition to being visually saturated, the poem is also vivid in its sensation and emotion. “捅破它的颅腔” (stabs through its skull) “抚摸着” (caressing) “剐蹭着” (scratching)… this series of actions between the poet and the pea flower brings the plant’s texture to its imagery. The intimate and private actions also make the writer’s unique perspective on the plant assessable and sharable to the readers. Moreover, the mention of “含氯清水” (chlorine bleach) evokes the olfactory sensation as its pungent smell overturns the sense of serenity which is oftentimes associated with a flower’s image. The poet shapes the sensational experience for her readers in a particular way that its spirit comes across as critical, provoking, and rebellious. The emotion in the poem is interestingly self-contradictory: while the writer “捅破” (to stab), “割断” (cut), feels “生气” (angry), and views the plucked flower as a “战利品” (trophy), there is a sense of sympathy and attachment at the same time when examining words such as “抚摸” (to caress) and “肉欲” (carnal desire).
There are a few challenges in the translation process, one of them being “无心” (heartless), which appears twice in the poem. Alternative translations in previous versions include “careless”, “don’t care to”, “aren’t meant to”. While “careless” fails at its accuracy to “无心” and “aren’t meant to” weakens the agency of “us”, it is translated into “don’t have the heart to” and “heartless” in the finalized version.
I intuitively translated “生气” into “mad” at my first attempt despite knowing that “mad” is closer to insanity rather than anger. The previous choice projects my interpretation of the poem as an underlying gender critique supported by a few potential hints: the three-time repetitions of “女人” (woman), the scene’s location in the kitchen, a space conventionally assigned to the female role, the mention of repression between forms/shapes/bodies in the second last line, and the hidden narrative in the right column “我 无心 是女人” (I don’t have the heart to be woman). The interpretation is rather subjective and has not been approved by the writer. I eventually turned back to “angry” in order to stay truthful to the original.
“剐蹭” is another word that may lead to a challenging decision — an alternative translation would be “rubbing”, which conveys more intimacy than “scratching” and fits the previous “caressing”. However, I chose “scratching” for it nicely imitates “剐”’s sound (gua – cra). The translation of “形” could also be “form”, “shape”… I picked “body” with the intention to reflect the poem’s physicality.