If there is one healthcare topic more taboo than mental health, it must surely be sexual health. Our sexual health is defined by our ability to accept and enjoy our sexuality, including having a respectful and positive approach to sexual conduct and relationships. From an objective position, this may seem sensible and straightforward. However, when overlaid with social stigma and the common desire to keep intimate matters behind closed doors, sexual health can be a difficult topic to navigate.
Crazy for Love
Sexual health has been known for centuries to be inextricably linked to mental and physical wellbeing. As a matter of fact, the word hysteria was derived from the Greek noun hystera which meant ‘womb’. In the 1800s, women who complained of anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, lustful fantasies, and unexplained moistness between the legs were commonly diagnosed to be suffering from the terminally vague ailment of hysteria.
The solution to alleviating the dark moods of these women was physician-administered paroxysm, a convoluted way of referring to assisted masturbation. By 1880, to save physicians from the chronic hand fatigue involved in treating their sexually frustrated female patients, the first electromechanical personal massager was invented, paving the way to the modern vibrators that we know and love.
Looking back, it may seem absurd to think that women were once believed to be immune to sexual desires. Indeed, society as a whole has come a long way since the 19th century. As body positivity movements gain steam around the world, more people are accepting LGBTQ+ and gender-diverse identities. Perhaps this means that we are finally ready to discuss sexual health in the mainstream.
According to research, frequent sexual activity increases satisfaction towards mental health, enhances feelings of trust and passion in relationships, and improves the ability to perceive and express emotions. In addition, the feel-good hormones—endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin—released during sex can help boost our overall mood and reduce symptoms of stress and depression.
A study conducted with over six thousand respondents found that subjects who remained sexually active during the COVID-19 lockdown had significantly less psychological distress, including lower anxiety and depression scores. As many people around the globe are still being confined and socially isolated, there are concerns that pandemic control measures are interrupting sexual activity, thus indirectly affecting mental health.
Aside from mental benefits, the physical benefits of an active sex life are numerous. From burning calories to aiding cardiovascular health, lowering blood pressure to strengthening muscles, sex is fundamentally a light to moderate exercise that you can do in your own home. It also helps us to soothe pain and boost immunity, and that after-sex glow has been found to make us look more youthful. Incredible!
Let’s Get It On
On all accounts, sex seems like a fantastic pursuit. However—as with most things that involve other people—it can turn out to be a little complicated. It has been said that the most important sex organ is, in fact, the brain as sexual desire is largely cultivated in the mind. Just as stress can negatively impact libido, lack of communication can decrease intimacy. Being able to connect and communicate with your partner is one of the precursors to a healthy sexual relationship.
With our many daily commitments and distractions, it can be challenging for couples to remember to be emotionally intimate. Relationship counselors recommend that couples set aside half an hour a day or designate a weekly date night to focus on each other. Through building a closer rapport with their partner and developing mutual attraction, couples can establish a foundation for better sexual interactions and satisfaction.
Being open and honest about sexual expectations and desires is another way for couples to increase the rewards of sex. With the media and pornography distorting sexual portrayal, individuals may feel conflicted about how they are expected to perform during sex. As one of the biggest contributing factors of erectile dysfunction, anxiety and self-consciousness can affect even young males. Candid conversations between partners can help to allay such anxieties and pre-empt unfounded fears.
Of course, sexual activity is not just limited to penetrative intercourse. Many of the neurochemicals that make us feel happy can still be triggered through other types of physical intimacy such as kissing or massage. Focusing on touch sensations and using playful sex toys and props with your partner can be extremely pleasurable for all parties involved. Individuals may find that the mental barriers to a fulfilling sexual experience will diminish with each successful intimate episode.
But what if you have no partner or don’t want one? Experts agree that masturbation can offer many similar benefits to sex such as relieving stress and sexual tension. In addition, solo sexual activities are important for good sexual health and promote body awareness and acceptance. Masturbation can be an affirming act of self-love without the risk of sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy. So, why not love yourself?
Ultimately, sex is a part of our biological existence. Just as mental and physical health is important to our overall well being, sexual health can affect how we feel and behave. By being true to ourselves and communicating our needs and wants, we can help ourselves and our partners achieve greater intimacy and sexual satisfaction. While sex is merely one way of improving our quality of life, it is surely one of the more enjoyable methods, and should no longer be kept under lock and key.