Seeing a person you love battle drug and alcohol addiction is difficult. Watching them struggle through the physical, mental, social and professional changes that addiction causes while being uncertain about their future could feel like a nightmare.
The first thought for many in similar positions is to get them to seek professional rehabilitation. While this is a crucial step towards starting the process of their recovery, a person who is suffering from addiction might put up strong resistance to the idea. The journey to their recovery, therefore, requires a lot of patience, determination and understanding.
What then should you do?
Be resolute
Before embarking on this journey to recovery with your loved one, you must recognize that it will be a long, tough and often discouraging journey. Recovery is often a life-long process. People suffering from addiction may not realize or accept that they have a problem or want to change. In some cases, they may feel embarrassed or uncomfortable with speaking about their struggles or getting help from a professional.
Sometimes, after making progress, persons suffering from addiction might act in a way that sets them several steps back. Relapses in the journey towards sobriety are very common and should be expected
When any of these happen, it’s easy to become resigned but no positive change will occur in their lives because of that. You should remain resolute and focused on doing your best to convince them to do what will be in their best interest.
Be positive
Being optimistic has been proven to help deal with stress and improve perspective towards situations. Having this attitude will put you in a better place mentally and potentially rub off on your loved one.
The alternative – pessimism – makes it easy to become resigned and accepting of the current reality. Having this attitude makes it near impossible to provide your loved one with the help and support they require.
Be empathetic
Approaching people who have addictions with harshness or judgment only further reaffirms the fear and shame that they might be experiencing. This might frustrate them further and make them unwilling to get or accept help.
It is crucial to understand how difficult it is for them to avoid the substances that they have become dependent on and how the substance they abuse has altered their brains and its functioning. This understanding will help you realize that they are usually not in full control of their actions.
What you should do is listen to and encourage them. Support, affirm and appreciate their efforts towards recovery.
Do your best to avoid becoming cruel and impatient when they have a relapse because that is very likely to happen. Prepare ahead for such scenarios and decide how to approach them in the event it happens.
Educate yourself
In educating yourself, the first step is listening to your loved one and trying to understand them. It is very useful to learn if their addiction is as a result of an underlying problem or mental health issue. This will help you determine how to approach them from the beginning.
Speaking to a professional is also very important. This will enable you to gain more perspective on addiction and the unique case of your loved one. A professional would also be able to guide you on what to do and what not to do when engaging them.
Learn all you can on what addiction does and how the substance they are addicted to, in particular, shapes their actions and person. You could also learn about simple exercises that strengthen inhibition and how to administer them. This should, of course, be with the approval and guidance of a professional.
Take care of yourself
It is easy to become overwhelmed and consumed by another person’s journey that you forget to take care of yourself. Avoid getting to that point. Be intentional about creating time for yourself and doing the things that help you relax.
Dedicate time to check in on yourself to understand how you are feeling, the state of your mental and physical health, if you are still willing or able to continue on the journey with your loved one and if you need help from other people who know and love them.
Frequent exercise, meditation and journaling are also known to help improve one’s mood and put them in a better place physically and mentally.
Finally, see a therapist. You will benefit a great deal from having someone who listens to you and is invested in your own mental and physical well-being.
Know your limits
In all this, it is crucial that you realize that there is a limit to what you can do. Be willing to accept help from other people and actively seek out the right professionals your loved one needs to receive the guidance and treatment they require to make a full recovery.